In my last post I looked at how we inadvertently enter into faith groups where the ultimate high of finding God is eventually replaced by a gnawing sense that something is not quite right. Such a psycho-spiritual itch is often a warning that we have swapped spiritual freedom for a subtle or not so subtle form of spiritual abuse.
Most of us don’t want to admit that we have suffered such abuse. Frankly it makes us look stupid both to ourselves and those to whom we are religiously joined. Yet, it’s an admission that must be made, if only for our ongoing mental and emotional health as well as our future psycho-spiritual freedom. Once we understand that spiritual abuse lies along an increasing spectrum of danger can we find the courage to ‘come out’ and place our experiences somewhere along the abuse line.
So what is going on when our lower unconscious begins to send us warning signals regarding our predicament and perhaps more importantly, why do we remain in such an environment, many of us for decades or more?
I see the problem as two-fold:
1) We are hooked onto the desire emanating from the leader(s) and that flowing from the collective group consciousness.
2) We hold a philosophical world view or paradigm that hides such desire exchanges in a quasi-logical protective and heavily disguised coating.
In this post I wish to examine the first of these. The second I will look at in my next post.
All faith groups of whatever flavor, hold out a taste of what it is to be in touch with God as the carrot to satisfy our metaphysical angst. They appear to act as a channel through which the Divine has chosen to flow, in its attempts to save the world. Our needy psyche-soul jumps at the chance to be at the supposed cutting edge of God’s dealings with mankind. The more radical the group the greater the thrill of being onboard the ride of our lives.
Many who have read my writings have suggested that I have it in for church leaders; not so. I see many of them as equal victims of the desire dynamic as much as their loyal flock. Some however do understand such a desire transfer and milk it for all they are worth. It is amazing what people will often do to ‘keep in touch’ with the Divine Will. When we see a wealthy religious leader we see one, not necessarily blessed by God, but one that has learned to use the tools of the metaphysical desire trade, a sort of spiritual snake-oil sales executive.
The more intense the ‘vision’ of the religious leader, the more we wish to join them in it. If such a vision has come from God, then who wouldn’t? In desiring to be like such a leader we thus open ourselves to possible manipulation and control, the very essence of spiritual abuse. Due to the subliminal nature of desire magnetism of mimesis , we follow such leaders into their latest interpretation of the Divine Will, one that often appears to benefit the group’s psycho-spiritual cohesion and the elevation of the leader’s particular mythical standing in the eyes of their followers.
The main tool of desire exchange is the weekly ‘teaching’ or in the case of more sacramental faith groups, the weekly ritual. These are both powerful instruments in channeling the desire of the preacher or celebrant to the audience sitting before them. Much of this desire stems from the psyche of such a leader. If their psyche is deeply fragmented then its desire will be aimed at maintaining their personal safety in the midst of such a potential whirlpool of desire fertilisation. If the one in question has undergone significant levels of psycho-spiritual healing then the desire can flow from their human spirit via the reintegrated psyche and into the ‘hearts’ or spirits off their audience. Summing up psyche to psyche desire transfer often ends in tears, spirit to spirit in further healing and inspiration.
So why the itch?
At some point in our group involvement we begin to sense that the leader has begun to put up a defensive barrier when we press in to drink of their desire flow. A state of confusion results as we begin to wonder what we’ve done wrong. If this person is a mouthpiece or representative of God, and close to the Divine heart then we mistakenly interpret this new distancing of the leader as the very reaction of God Himself. The result is an increase in effort to try to please the Divinity and his representative. If the leader says jump we jump, believing ourselves to be jumping for Jesus!
Unfortunately our new efforts on the zeal front are misinterpreted by the leader. They perceive us as being after their Being! Our ever-increasing conformity to their will in the guise of Divine Will, sets off leadership alarm bells. ‘This follower is becoming so like me that they must want to replace me; bluntly put they must want my job!’
The resulting war footing, accompanied by its new levels of emotional control together with the follower’s fresh attempts to please ignite a desire chain reaction that will end in expulsion.
Leaders who spiritually abuse may be totally unaware of what they are doing, for they live the religious life through a wounded sub-personality that they keep hidden in the safety of their lower unconscious. The follower who is abused, caught up in the desire to please in order to obtain the being of the leader model is also unaware of the psychological dynamic taking place; that is until the expulsion crisis pops up in the light of consciousness.
Finally let me look at the ‘group consciousness’ and its role in the abuse experienced. The strange thing about mimetic or desire groups is that they appear to have a life of their own one greater than the sum of their individual members. Just watch a large sport’s crowd or attendees at a stadium rock concert to see this group desire flow in action. In heightened states of consciousness, the group sends out a massive desire flow towards the performers. The performer in turn sends back a desire response that lifts the crowd to a whole new level of unity and desire buzz. This is the very nature of excitement.
The same dynamic occurs to varying degrees in faith groups in their weekly get-togethers known as meetings or services. Most religious groups have their focal person, whether they like to acknowledge it or not, and it is this channel of desire that brings unity and indeed conformity to the group identity. In essence the group and the leader are one. In an abusive group, the group subliminally mimic the abuse of their leader for their strength and unity is the conscious goal dressed up in religious language. Strangely though all the individual members of such groups are both abusers and the abused; scapegoaters and the scapegoated. All our oblivious to their dual state until the expulsion of a fellow member occurs, but during such a potential turning point the group and its leader are quick to neutralize the danger with a newly tweaked group narrative. And so the abuse continues.
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What difference is there between the person who attends the weekly ritual or reads the daily blog? Or between the leader of those events for that matter?
A most perceptive question Gene. All sources of insight, whether blog or faith community sermon have the potential for psychological dependency. Truth that gives life ought always to push us back from such dependency enabling us to tap into our own Divine connection. Anything that doesn’t do so I believe is probably not an expression of Truth or the Divine Presence.
Regarding the weekly attendance at a faith group and blog reading, I do believe there to be a vital if subtle difference. Within a physical meeting of believers there is a group dynamic in progress, a mimetic pull to come into harmony with the preacher or celebrant and indeed with one another. over a period of time, in my personal experience, such conformity to the vibrational or spiritual frequency of the human focal point will eventually result in a likeness to the transcendent model, one that eventually sets of a rivaling relationship of Monstrous Doubles.
The benefits of being a blogger is that both physical and indeed social distance between he/she and their readers can prevent the mimetic process from taking root. Of course it does raise other issues, but ones not I believe not linked to my material on the lock in of spiritual abuse systems.
Hope that helps Gene.
Blessings
Dylan
Your response shows that you have thought of this before I asked the question, and I very much appreciate that you have.
With you, I too believe there is a difference. But I am not ready to agree that there is a dynamic group process in place with the preacher that is absent from the blogger. Indeed, I think that the manner of postings on Facebook tell us that group dynamics, peer pressure, and mimetic pull is just as much — perhaps even more — present in places were blogs appear.
Hi Gene, I guess that all human connection holds its share of mimetic desire. For the blogger and those reading the medium is the written word and not the total package of the whole person as is the case within a faith community. Personally I haven’t come across a case of spiritual abuse from a blogger as such, certainly not one that locks the victim into a psychological connection that they can’t easily step back from in order to maintain freedom. Thankfully such freedom lies at the click of a mouse.
The network of peer and Model relationships, together with those of family who are ‘members’ of a faith group is a much more difficult one to detach from.
Addictions will latch onto anything that communicated desire, whether metaphysical or otherwise. I guess that is all part of the risk of sharing our stories, whether in cyber-space or in face to face gatherings or ritual.
It raises some interesting issues. Perhaps some younger mind than ours ought to research the blog addiction phenomenon ASAP.
Blessings
Dylan
That is one area where I agre the internet is a bit safer than face-to-face contact. One click to freedom, whereas withdrawing from a living community has so many more dynamics associated with it, that we see abused people actually trying to protect their abusers.
On the other hand, unless the entire community is suffering from the same defect, there are other people present in a living community to help moderate the influences of one person, while on the internet it may be that one becomes addicted in isolation and there are no moderating influences from others.
Good points Gene!
People feel lost and look for answers. Often they look for answers in another person, and when direct instructional answers are not forthcoming…such as, telling people to look within themselves…they can become frustrated and angry. They want an authority figure to spell it all out for them. I guess there is a place for this but it can set the scene for addiction and abuse, what would you say?
Tessie
Hi Tessie
Thanks for dropping by and commenting! I guess some of us never grow up and always want a big daddy or momma figure to tell us what to do or indeed to fix everything. OK when we’re 4 but not 44 I reckon. The wisest of teachers tells their listeners that teachers are not required. Unfortunately this advice isn’t given too often within faith circles where dependency is the religious norm.
All addiction is a result of not looking inward and facing up to the reality of our freagmented Self, one to be forgiven and loved before reintegration and healing can flow. Again many of us would rather remain addicts than face that loneley journey.
Blessings
Dylan